Welcome to Week of Holes part II. Week of holes I as you’ll remember was a butt load of weeks ago. THAT my friends is how long it takes to get hole appointments to fix your broken holes.
You may remember my friend Cervix. She is an angry old broad. Turn out her neighbors are just as pissy. I’m not going into much more detail because even I have limits. I guess this is where I draw the hole line. Except by definition a hole is nothing and can’t have lines. That’s how limity my holes actually are. THEY HAVE INVISIBLE LINES.
Hole 1 is my southern most hole and the hole doctor told me that I need some meds to fix up my hole. Here’s the real kicker: I can’t take them until G is done breastfeeding. Now originally my goal was to breastfeed for a year and we’re only a month away from that. However, after the last killmyface cold that he just had, I was hoping to get through flu season and still breastfeed. (breastfeeding gives them super steel germ shields). But then I realized that it’s time. It’s time for me to get a part of my life back and put myself first.
Those are the words that every mother is afraid to say out loud. Putting yourself before your children gets you immediate worldwide female side eye. We are trained to be the best mothers in the world and if we’re not, at least pretend we are. Especially on your facebook status.
And my situation is this: By putting my health first and taking the hormones that I need to to feel better, I will be a better mother, wife and overall person. No one wants an angry bird in their house and certainly not an angry vagina. And being a good mother comes in a butt load (i’m going to say butt load a lot now) of forms. Not just how we feed our baby. A really great friend told me that breastfeeding our baby is powerful but mothering is way more powerful. Like super powers powerful. And she’s right.
And this moment, formula feeding mothers, is for you:
In the hippie community (I’m *ALMOST* a real life member) most women breastfeed until the child is ready to wean. There are definitely huge health benefits to prolonged breastfeeding. And you all know by now that I couldn’t give 8 shits what anyone thinks about when, where or how I breastfeed G. But this feeling brewing in my boobs surprised me. I felt a little shame with my decision to wean now. No one made me feel that way, I felt it all on my very own. But I felt like I was going to be judged for putting myself before my baby.
And then I thought: This must be what bottle feeding formula moms feel from us breastfeeders.
And by no fault (for the most part) of the breastfeeders, the shame is just there. Because we’re all afraid of being judged for GASP not being a good mother. So ANY tiny amount of side eye or innocent (not so innocent) comment by either side is really taken to heart and can feel like tiny baby penguin murder in our souls.
And my situation made me think about the billion balls of situations out there that formula moms face and why they choose the bottle over the boob juice. And their situation is their situation. And if it makes them happier, better mothers, hotter bitches, then good for them.
Because I don’t want to be judged and I will not judge anyone else.
We’re all doing the best we can here and no one really knows what the F they’re doing anyway. So I’m going to say it again. We need to support each other as women and moms. Because men are too busy staring at their penises or something.
Tomorrow I get my northern holes fixed.
I’m sure I’ll develop some enlightening realization about the ethics of molars tomorrow.
No. No I won’t.
No wars in the comments. I won’t put up with it. I will burn your face down.
Love and Lust,